Blogger Sequia said...

Oh my gosh, I am so very sorry. Even though I haven't been around for a long time, I have never stopped thinking of you. I have gone through a very rough period here where the board members tried to get us evicted (but to no avail)but that is now over with.
Please know that my heart goes out to you and I share in your tears. I bet you anything that Mike is with my CJ playing around and having a grand ole time!! You are a great mom to your babies and Mike knew that so very well. You are what kept him around longer that anticipated. Hugs to you and Gidget.
Love, Cynthia and the gang.

April 17, 2009 9:29 AM

Thank you so my Cynthia for being here for me. Without you and all my wonderful friends here, at IMOM, Mike's Craigslist friends and Facebook comments and supportive e-mails, I don't think I could do this on my own.

Just a note to update everyone. As you would imagine... it was a very difficult night last night. I kept checking the corner next to the bed where Mike would normally start sleeping... he wasn't there. I woke up in the middle of the night and got out of bed, being careful not to step on him because he always moved to lay on the comforter next to the bed in the middle of the night. He wasn't there. The comforter was empty. I know I should pick it up off the floor, but I just can't do it yet.

The worst part of all of this is Gidget. For the few days that Mike was so very sick, she was so calm and totally understanding of something going on. This morning, after I let her out of her "room" (she sleeps in her crate), she ran into the bedroom to wake him up with tons of whisker kisses like she always did. He wasn't there. She checked behind the couch (in the corner) where he would be (if not laying next to me or in the bedroom)... he wasn't there. How do I explain this to her? All morning now, she's been whining and going from one door to the other. She's so confused. Last night, it seemed she knew he was gone. She was very quiet, placid and just laid next to me the entire afternoon and evening. This morning, it's like she's expected him to come back. It makes it so hard seeing her like this.

I'm going to work this afternoon. I have to... not only to start paying some of what I owe for his treatments but also to keep my mind off of what's going on (and hopefully give Gidget a chance to relax for awhile in her room). The thing is... I am getting Mike's ashes back this morning, so he will be right with me on my desk today.... I'm not quite sure if that will make it easier or harder for me to concentrate. Whatever... he'll be with me.

I've tried to attach links to the slideshows of Mike and his sister here from photo bucket, but for some reason, they don't come across. If I figure it out, I'll post them later or tomorrow.

Thank you all again and again, and may God Bless Each And Every One Of You