My poor Mike is still having such problems. This is so very hard to watch. He lost his bladder during the night again and again a little while ago. Sweet Deb offered and is going to send some doggy diapers for him to wear at night. I'm just praying so hard that this will pass, but trying to prepare myself if it doesn't.
I knew he wasn't feeling good yesterday. First thing in the morning, he vomited up clear liquid. About an hour and a half later, I made him some eggs and some toast for him in the morning and he ate it all up. A few hours later, he had an upset stomach, but thank God he was able to rest a bit, and it went away. He slept very deep the rest of the day... extremely deep. Around 6:30, I took a can of tuna and put it over some kibble... soaked the kibble in the tuna juice first with the tuna on top. THANK GOD he ate it. He didn't quite finish the kibble, but I was so glad to see that he ate all of the tuna and most of the kibble. I was hoping it would give him energy enough to play.. but it didn't. He went right back to sleep.
He didn't want to eat this morning so I just let him rest. A little while ago I mixed up some Progresso Beef and Baked Potato soup (it's all I had) with about a handful of kibble. I warmed it up for him, and he ate it very well... again, though, leaving some of the kibble. Unfortunately within seconds after he ate.. he lost his bladder again.. not much.. but it happened.
I know I've been so blessed that Mike has been doing so well... and I'm grateful for each and every day that he's felt good and played and eaten and been with me.... but that makes days like these even harder to grasp. I pray that he goes back to being able to be in control... but in reality, I know that might not happen. I think I have to start preparing myself... I hate to think of it, but now I'm wondering how long this will go on... how bad will he get before I have to make that final decision? I mean.. he's not in pain, and I don't mind cleaning him up or cleaning after him, and he has started eating a little again.... but still that thought is there... how much longer will he be able to eat... has the cancer spread so much that his bladder will never be strong enough... is he "really" "not" in pain ... how far should I let him go before I make the decision to let him go... will I be strong enough to make that decision???? So many questions.
I know everyone says that our pets will let us know when they are ready to leave... but what if he's not ready or doesn't tell me? What if the decision is totally up to me because I hate to see him going through all of this even if he's not in extreme pain? Is it wrong to even think this way right now? Am I jumping the gun? Is it wrong to let him go before he does feel pain? I feel like a horrible, horrible mom right now even thinking about this stuff. Please don't be upset with me for bringing all of this up. I know how much you all care for Mike, and I am so very grateful for all of you... but my baby is starting to fade on me, and I don't want him ever to hurt to the point where he says he's had enough... no one should ever hurt that bad. I guess I'm rambling now. I wasn't going to even mention all this stuff here right now... but I just felt the need to share my thoughts, concerns, fears and questions. I don't even want to "think" about this.. let alone write about it... and I certainly don't want to "ever" have to make that decision. This is just so very hard.
Amy, Im, Splight... Thank you for stopping and posting on Mike's thread. You all mean so very much to us. ... and Splight.. it's good to see you back again. Hugs to all the furkids.
I can't write anymore. I'll keep you all informed as to what's going on.
Love & Blessings
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Joanna, I am hoping that Mike is feeling better this evening. I know how you are feeling and I wish I could help in some way. Try to be there for Mike this week end and enjoy your moments together. He's full of surprises. You know that he's been know to rally completely and act like nothings ever happened. Isn't it amazing how dogs can do that?? They are just so "for the moment" and they deal with things so much better than we humans do.
I will be checking in later to see how things are going for you both.
I want to thank you and commend you for what you all did for Debbie and Jack...what an amazing thing went on over last week end...Bravo to you all...
I haven't been feeling the best so I haven't had time to write but I am sure reading everything...
Sending great big hugs to you all, Judy
May 23, 2008 5:18 PM
There really isn't anything I can say to make you feel better, but know that you are in my prayers.
Love and Hugs,
Amy
May 23, 2008 10:02 PM
Jo,
I had no idea that Mike was having so many problems. My heart goes out to you, and of course my prayers are with both you and Mike.
You will know when it is time to let Mike go. It's not time yet. If you can, keep him on soft, non fatty foods - scrambled eggs, toast with a little peanut butter. It doesn't sound like he wants the kibles, so I wouldn't even bother with that. Maybe some rice and beef with the fat drained off of the beef, or even chicken with a little chicken broth added.
I know that chicken broth, rice, and canned chicken are really low priced in dollar stores.
Just keep loving Mike, and he will let you know when he is ready to go. It isn't an easy thing to do, but I have faith that you will know when that time comes.
Please let me know if there is anything that I can do. My prayers are with you both.
Debbie and Priss
p.s. Can you send me a copy of the picture of Mike sitting in the grass with the white boarder going around the picture? My email address is debbie.mcmurray@eds.com
May 23, 2008 11:40 PM
I am reading, but not posting much...but please know that U, Mike and Gidge are always in my heart.
Hugs!
Cindy, Tuck and Justie!
May 25, 2008 12:41 AM