Monday update (please read previous post)

I just got off the phone with Dr. Scott. He was so nice and understanding, but it's really not good news (I didn't think it would be). My heart is broken, and I want to cry so bad right now, but I don't want Mike to see me.

First, he said there's really nothing to be done for the clots. He said if he took an anti-coagulant or baby asprin or anything like that, it could make his bladder fill with blood (since we already know the blood is in there).

Second, he said it's quite possible that one or more of the nodules have (or are) growing into larger tumors that is causing the clots. He also agreed that it's "possible" (but only possible) that the rough play could have jarred some of the clots from the bladder wall causing them to being eliminated. But... he said even if Mike wasn't rough-housing, eventually they would have started dropping out anyway. So, I'm not going to stop him from playing... after all.. he needs "some" fun in his life (for as much life as he has left).

Third, (and this kills me)... I asked him, "so this is the beginning of the end"... he hesitated and said, "I wish I could tell you no... but, I'm afraid so". With that.. well, my whole day turned gray. The sun might as well be black. It's warming up outside, but it might as well be 50 below zero. My boy doesn't have much longer. Oh God... I'm trying to accept the things I can't change.. but it's so very hard.

He was glad to hear that Mike doesn't have a problem urinating (even though some of it is red), at least the flow is still there (except when a clot passes). He told me not to change anything... keep the food the same, make sure he drinks lots of water and just keep an eye on him to make sure he can pee smoothly (which he has no problem doing yet). I hate this!!! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it!

Ok... gotta go now... I'm sorry, I was going to go to everyone's thread today, but there's no way I could sound up and happy right now. I'd just be a downer to everyone. I'll try later or tomorrow.

Love & Blessings To All